5 Reasons A Parent Coach Will Change Your LIfe

Coach Consoling Dejected Football Player

Most parents will tell you that they loved their child instantly.  From the moment they were born, maybe even conceived, they knew that they would love them unconditionally, eternally.

Loving comes naturally.

Parenting? Not so much.

Parenting is not for the faint of heart.  It can be knock down, drag out hard.  Take your breath away, drop you to your knees hard. On good days you know what to do, and you just have to get it done.  But then there are days, when you have no idea what to do. Wouldn’t it be great to just have someone to look at your life and help you see the answers clearly? Of course it would, that’s why having a parent coach can be so great.

Positively parenting describes parent coaches as less Supernanny and more personal trainer for your parenting style.  Taking a strong personal belief on child development and parenting philosophy the coach fine tunes it with your families individual needs in mind.

On Amazon this morning there were over 150,000 books on parenting available.  Who has time to read all of those?  Anyone? Anyone?  You’re already taking the test, here’s why a parent coach can help you with the answers.

Your parent coach cares about YOUR family’s needs.  It’s not uncommon for partners or extended family members to let’s say, have a difference of opinion on the best way to handle a particular parenting dilemma.  Your parent coach can help you find a common ground and have confidence moving forward with your decisions.

Your parent coach has an objective set of eyes at the problems you’ve been trying your hardest to solve. Have you ever looked through your house for something, let’s say keys, for what seems like forever, then someone else walks in and finds them in one seems like seconds? When you are close to a problem, you don’t always have the clearest view of the solution.  An outside set of eyes can work wonders on the problems that have been driving you mad.

Your parent coach has the experience to save you hours, days, months of time searching for answers. A good parent coach has an advanced degree, with hundreds, maybe thousands of hours working directly with kids, and families.  They have read the best books, articles, blogs and most importantly they’ve put the advice of the best experts into practice and can streamline your path to parenting bliss.

Your parent coach will work with your schedule to make a plan that fits your life. We know your time is limited.  We can meet in person, over the phone, or Skype.  The only thing that matters is that we make the connection and get you the help that you need. We come up with a plan that’s doable for you, no one size fits all approach.

Your parent coach will use YOUR definition of success in your home. Maybe you feel really comfortable as a parent, but haven’t been able to tackle the one problem of miserable morning full of rushing and frustration.  Your parent coach will work on as much or as little as you need to make your life easier.  You know when we are done, because you decide.

Your life can be changed by your parent coach, changed for the better.

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Who’s in Charge Here???

This is my Leila. Cute, huh?

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This is what she chose to wear to her sister Temple’s soccer game.

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Now let me not give you the impression that this was an unusual day, this was an ensemble she chose on an earlier, cool winter afternoon. (Pay no attention to the messy room she should have been cleaning, instead of the accessorizing she was doing, I was kind enough to crop out a good deal of it)

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Let’s say she has a mind of her own, specifically when it comes to her wardrobe.  Other things too, but definitely her clothes.  I am already dreading her life in school uniforms, but that is for another day, and another post.

There was a time when I probably wouldn’t have allowed such costumes to leave the house.  A time when I would have forced her to change into something a little more standard, you know something that matched.  After all, I’m in charge here. I say what is and isn’t acceptable wardrobe, right?

But alas those days are gone.  As the youngest of four girls, my Leila has the great pleasure of reaping the rewards from years of child rearing.  I have learned what is and isn’t worth fighting over.  Clearly, I won’t be letting Leila run out in the snow in a swimsuit but I have discovered the number one way to avoid power struggles with kids.

Give your kids power to make good choices. Every chance you get.

Amy McCreedy over at PositiveParentingSolutions.com desrcibes is as giving kids positive power and control throughout the day. She lists it as the number one way to tame temper tantrums.  The truth is as much as we think kids are controlling our lives, they often feel the exact same way.  Things like bedtime routines and organized snack time, which are completely necessary, sometimes leave kids feeling like they never get to be heard.  Finding simple ways of letting kids assert some control will allow them to feel good about their choices, and not look for ways of having more power.  (I’ll spare you the picture of a screaming toddler, but you know the visual I’m going for here)

I hear parents all the time say things like, “You have to let kids know who’s in charge” or “If you don’t let them know who’s the boss, they’ll run all over you”.  Ok, maybe I heard myself say that.

I agree, kids need to respect their parents authority, but kids who feel more confident in the small decisions that they make will be less likely to act out and make bigger mistakes as time goes by.  Kids who work through their own choices, with a parent’s guidance are more likely to make better choices in the future.

I know it can be challenging but here are three choices your kids can safely make most days, and tips for implementing in your life today.

1. Wardrobe: Remember my Leila the next time your little princess wants to wear her tiara to church.  You may get a few strange looks, but who are you hurting?  Want to start a little smaller, even the youngest toddler can choose between a red shirt and a blue.  Worried about time?  Pick out clothes the night before. Then you might even have an excited child getting dressed in the morning.  Follow up with a compliment about the choice, and suddenly you have the trifecta of parenting delight!

2.Food: I know this one is loaded, but hear me out.  No, I don’t expect you to fix chicken nuggets every night, but think kids menu at IHOP, not the entire grocery freezer section.  If you are a meal planner, let the kids pick from the cookbook, once or twice.  If you’re standing in front of the fridge feeling uninspired, pull one of the kids in and let them help you with the choice.  I’m seeing at least a few extra bites of dinner down the hatch, when the kids see their choice on the table.

3. Activities: The nice thing about modern day America, is there is no shortage of expos, events, or activities to choose from on a daily basis.  Often we push kids into the things that we think they should do, but what about giving them the choice?  I’m willing to bet if there were more choices given in advance, there would be less t-ballers refusing to bat on Saturday morning, and a few less frustrated parents to boot.

Kids need to feel not only the power to make choices, but pride from successful ones and the experience gained from the less than stellar.  Ultimately, you have enough things to think about in your day, leave the simple ones to the kids.